Comrades, we have all heard the stereotype of the “crazy cat lady.” She is usually depicted as a reclusive, disheveled old woman who hoards cats. We assume she just got crazy on her own, but what if she went mad because of her cats? Well, not only because of them.
Science tells us that there may be a biological reason for this “crazy cat lady syndrome“ that starts in the kitty litter box with a parasite called toxoplasma gondii that causes toxoplasmosis.
This “T. gondii“ appears to be a master of manipulation, literally controlling its infected host so that it can get inside a cat to reproduce. (Not to be confused with rapper, T Gondii, who is also controlling and obsessed with “the pussy”)
Allow Wise Teacher Chairman Meow to explain toxoplasmosis while he ponders how it could be wielded as an effective biological weapon for kitty world domination.
Toxoplasma Gondii: The Puppet Master in the Litter Box
T. gondii is one of the most prevalent and successful parasites on the planet, infecting about 60 million Americans with toxoplasmosis.
Tip: To put that large number in simpler terms, just imagine 12.2 times the number of people who watch The Masked Singer each week. Or, 517 times the total population of Provo, Utah!
Toxoplasma gondii can only reproduce sexually inside the digestive system of a cat, so its life mission is to get into one. In order to do so, the parasite must catch a ride in an “intermediate host” like a mouse or rat that acts like a furry Uber, driving them to the closest kitty belly.
And, comrades, just like a late-night Uber ride in Provo, things can get weird quickly.
First, consider the universal law that that mice are afraid of cats, yes? Well, when a rodent is infected with toxoplasmosis, they lose this natural fear, and become slow, reckless, and easy for cats to catch.
It’s as if toxoplasmosis-infected mice want to be eaten by a cat.
Allow Chairman Meow to share scientific wisdom. In research at the University of California, Berkeley, scientists put toxoplasmosis-infected mice in a dark box with a dish of feline urine. Instead of cowering in fear like their healthy mouse friends, the toxo-infected mice carelessly wandered out in the open, attracted to the cat urine.
It seems that the toxoplasma gondii parasite reprograms the rodents’ brains to lose their fear of cats, making them more likely to be caught and eaten by one. When they are, the parasite is delivered directly back to the intestines of its feline host to reproduce.
So, the whole journey looks like this: cat poop –> host mammal –> kitty belly... repeat.
Reminds Chairman Meow of the circle of life from the Lion King; except instead of fragile balance of life in Africa, it is a parasite’s cyclical journey back to cat intestines. Chairman Meow wonders if Disney has bought the movie or musical rights yet?
How Can Cat Poop Make You Crazy?
So, if T. gondii can turn a mouse into a feline-seeking kamikaze pilot, what does the parasite do to humans?
People usually get infected by accidentally ingesting the parasite’s eggs (oocysts) through undercooked meat or by handling infected cat poop while cleaning the litter box. Then, once toxoplasma gondii is inside you, the parasite spreads from your intestines to your muscles and your brain causing toxoplasmosis. Behold this educational illustration approved by the Feline Ministry of Information:
It was long thought that a “dormant” toxoplasmosis infection in healthy people wasn’t serious, but recent research is concerning. Here are some alarming potential effects of Toxoplasma on mental health:
- Schizophrenia: A Danish study found that people exposed to T. gondii had a 47% higher risk of being diagnosed with the disease.
- May cause depression, anxiety, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) source
- Suicide: A massive study of 45,000 women showed that those with T. gondii antibodies were 1.5x times more likely to attempt suicide.
- Encourages risk-taking, aggression, dangerous behavior, and slower reaction time, resulting in a higher likelihood of traffic accidents source
Toxoplasma gondii wants to get back into a kitty belly ASAP!
And, by encouraging humans to hoard cats and die, (Chairman Meow should sell t-shirts with that slogan?) the parasite is actively improving its odds of getting there.
In other words, toxoplasmosis seems to control infected people like rodents. And, like the American healthcare system, it basically wants you to die alone and be eaten by your cats.
Suffering from schizophrenia? You are not alone!
Toxoplasmosis & Schizophrenia: It’s All In Your Head!
Clever Teacher Meow is very witty, and the masses greatly enjoy his schizophrenia jokes!
Anyway, the link between toxoplasmosis and schizophrenia is also very concerning, and may help explain “crazy cat lady syndrome.”
While most infected people with toxoplasmosis are asymptomatic, it appears more likely to trigger schizophrenia in people who are already genetically susceptible. Recent tests also imply a link between childhood exposure to cats and schizophrenia, plus a large number of schizophrenia patients also test positive for the presence of Toxoplasma gondii.
Why might toxoplasmosis cause schizophrenia?
The leading theories suggest the parasite might be physically altering neurons involved in memory and learning, possibly triggering a long-term immune response in the brain affecting how we function.
It’s also worth considering that Schizophrenia itself didn’t become a commonly diagnosed disease until the late 18th Century; the same time that house cats became popular pets. Coincidence? source
Like the president’s use of social media, this single-celled organism manipulates mammals, controlling millions in its fiendish plot, while driving others to literal insanity.
What is Crazy Cat Lady Syndrome?
Toxoplasmosis is also informally called, “Crazy cat lady syndrome” because of the prevalence of the infection among older women who hoard or own numerous cats. Usually the crazy cat lady stereotype also includes a disheveled appearance, messy house, and mental illness.
Let us contemplate why a person living alone with many cats has a much higher chance of contracting toxoplasmosis. Does the parasite make you hoard cats, or does hoarding cats give the parasite?
Is like the dilemma of which came first:
- the chicken or the egg?
- Adam and Eve or the dinosaurs?
Either way, “crazy cat lady syndrome“ is synonymous with toxoplasmosis and describes the common psychiatric symptoms of an infected person including cat-hoarding, poor self-care, and mental health issues.
How Cat Owners Can Avoid Toxoplasmosis
Unless you are pregnant, have a weakened immune system, or are genetically susceptible to schizophrenia, toxoplasmosis usually isn’t that serious, and most people won’t know they have it.
Here are some recommendations for how cat owners can avoid being infected:
- If you’re pregnant, have someone else change the kitty litter
- Change kitty litter daily, as the eggs usually aren’t infectious for the first 24 hours after being pooped out
- Keep rodents including mice away from your home
- Don’t hoard cats: If you live in squalor and feel compelled to get a 7th cat, it may already be too late
- Cook your dinner thoroughly. Undercooked meat is a major source of toxoplasma gondii infection. Consider getting a meat thermometer
- Garden with gloves: Cats often use gardens as giant outdoor litter boxes, so protect your hands while digging.
Toxoplasma Gondii: The Parasite in Cat Poop That Controls Your Brain
Actually, when you say that out loud it does sound kind of odd. Or, maybe like the plot of a B-movie at the bottom of your Netflix recommended list.
In any event, toxoplasmosis can be serious for those who are pregnant or vulnerable, and can lead to schizophrenia, cat-hoarding, and other behavior loosely referred to by names like crazy cat lady syndrome. While most infected people will never know they have it, you can take some simple steps to avoid exposure.
Chairman Meow would also like to take this opportunity to deny claims that toxoplasmosis was created and then leaked from a laboratory in Wuhan, China. I mean, why would the militant leader of the glorious Kitteh Revolution want to control the minds of millions of humans? 😼
Believe Chairman Meow!